Seasons of Lily
by Marauder-Evans27
Summary: "I've grown so dependent on him. Whenever I'm not with him, a part of me is missing. He is my other half. I am his. It's as simple as that... Isn't it? Isn't that how you're supposed to feel when you're in love?" Chase Wayward has been taking advantage of Lily Evans for too long. James is the only one that can make Lily see what this boy has done to her. He needed to save her. Now.
1. History Repeating

Seasons of Lily

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**Chapter One: History Repeating**

* * *

I love him. I love him. _I love him. _These are the words I've been trying to make sense of for the past year that Chase and I have been together. I've said them before. But why doesn't it feel right? They should. Whenever he's gone I feel empty. I've grown so dependent on him. But that's not right. I'm Lily Evans, I'm not _dependent _on anyone. Since when is a boy the measure of my happiness?

Ever since I started dating Chase Wayward in sixth year, it's like all of the things that made up who I am don't matter any more. All that matters to me is him. I get these butterflies whenever I think of him. But not the wonderful kind that make you feel silly and light. The kind where you are about to perform on stage and feel sick to your stomach. Oh god, what has this boy done to me?!

"LILY!" Brooke yelled, finally snapping me out of my thoughts. "Stuck in Chase land again? Jesus, you spent like all summer together, wasn't that enough?" Emma joked. I gave my best friends an unconvincing smile and they looked at me in concern. "What's up?" Brooke asked. I shifted uncomfortably and voiced aloud my thoughts.

"I dunno Lily, can I ask you a question?" I looked inquiringly at Emma. "Well... it's just- Does Chase_ really_ make you happy?" she blurted out.

I always knew my friends didn't approve of my relationship with Chase. They think he's too controlling and is taking advantage of my vulnerable nature. We used to constantly argue over whether he is "right for me" but eventually they gave up seeing as he wasn't just a fling of mine. For the first time in my life, I thought about it._ Does_ he make me happy?

I've grown so dependent on him. Whenever I'm not with him, a part of me is missing. He is my other half. I am his. It's as simple as that... Isn't it? Isn't that how you're supposed to feel when you're in love?

I didn't get a chance to answer that question because just then, none other than Chase Wayward slammed open our compartment door, sat down next to me and pulled me into a sloppy kiss as Emma and Brooke rolled their eyes and started talking to each other about a new band they recently discovered called the Weird Sisters.

"Hey babe!" he said with unnecessary volume. "I have a name, Chase" I said with a roll of my eyes. He released me. "Really? The first thing you say to me is the beginning of an argument?" he replied, shutting me down. Because that's just what happens when you challenge Chase Wayward. You get shut down.

"Oh, no. Sorry. I just..." But he cut me off by pulling me into another sloppy kiss. His hands slowly made their way up my back as he scuffed the bare skin that my shirt clung to. "Oiy! Get a room!" Brooke belted. Chase pulled away, smirking, said "See you at the feast, _Lily_" and with a wink, he left the compartment.

"Ew" was all Emma could say.

* * *

The rest of the train ride consisted of playing Exploding Snap and catching up on all the latest gossip.

"I _cannot_ believe it. _Six_ summer flings? I think that's an all time record Ms. Pierce!" Lily exclaimed. "Fraughcannozifey," Brooke mumbled while biting off the head of a chocolate frog. "Huh?" Lily and Emma replied together. Brooke gulped down the mass of chocolate in her mouth and went on. "What can I say? Guys just can't get enough of me, especially in bikini weather." Lily gave another one of her famous eye rolls and Emma chuckled.

"So, any hot guys I should know about?" Brooke questioned. Emma blushed and Lily put down her magazine to give Emma an _is-there-something-you-haven't-told-us_ look. "His name was Damien, and I dunno. I spent most of my summer in the library since you were off with Chase and Brooke was in California. I started to notice that he spent a lot of his summer there too. One day he sat next to me, and, well... he was sweet. We got to know each other, and become... what would you call it... library buddies?"

Brooke burst out a laugh but pretended to be choking on her cauldron cake. Lily scolded her and turned to Emma. "That's sweet. Did anything- erm... come of it? I mean did you ask him out?" Emma looked down. "No... I was going to! But then I chickened out... And, well... I'll probably never see him again." "Why not?" Brooke chimed back in. "I think you need some advice from this Sex God right here" she boasted, pointing two thumbs at herself. "Go to the library again. Find him, bring him to your house, cup a feel and be on with it!" "Ugh, you're starting to sound like Sirius Black" Emma replied, disgusted. Brooke's eyes widened at the name of the one Marauder she absolutely despised. Lily laughed at Brooke's reaction.

"Speak of the devils..." Emma muttered more to herself than anyone, looking into the hallway outside their compartment. Lily and Brooke followed her gaze and saw two dark-haired Marauders wandering past their compartment. Once they caught sight of the three girls glancing at them, Sirius winked and James' face lit up and he flashed a genuine smile in Lily's direction. They continued down the narrow passage between compartments and the girls watched them until they disappeared behind one of the drawn curtains in a compartment not too far from theirs.

Lily sighed. James had stopped hitting on Lily when she had started dating Chase in sixth year. Since then, all he offered her were polite gestures when greeted in the hallways. She had once thought that this was the best thing that had happened since dating Chase. No more remarks on her eyes which apparently reminded him of the green in a fire once it gets hot enough and you can start to pick out the different colours in the heart of the flames, or her hair like a fiery waterfall.

But eventually she started to miss him. Of course she would never admit it, but she couldn't help but wondering if Chase had done something to scare him off. Chase. It all came back to him. Lily didn't want her last year at Hogwarts to be like sixth year. She hated sixth year. She lost all her friends apart from Brooke and Emma, and even they seemed to become more distant.

_No, this year will be different. I won't let history repeat itself._ And with that she let the gentle rocking of the train and the voices of her two closest friends lull her to sleep as she closed her eyes.

* * *

_**A/N**: Hope you liked the first chapter! I'm just getting familiar with managing stories etc. so bear with me on the editing of it. I have a lot of ideas for this one and __hopefully_ I'll update within the week [I'm going to my cottage tomorrow and sadly there's no wifi but I'll drive into town if I have to in order to add the next chapter! :) ]

_xoxo_

_- Marauder-Evans_

_Oh and all feedback is welcome! Review __and I'll love you forever!_

_*Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Harry Potter. Those rights are reserved for JK. All praise her.*_


	2. A Message

Seasons of Lily

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**Chapter Two: A Message**

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James and Sirius sat at the Great Hall, mouths full of what looked like everything they could shove down their throats, from kidney pie to a heaping serving of mashed potatoes. Remus looked appalled at the sight and tried to ignore his two best friends by starting a conversation with a small, brunette first year.

"So how do you feel about Hogwarts so far?" Remus asked politely. But the first year couldn't take her eyes off of the sight in front of her. "Disgusting," she whispered under her breath. Remus sighed. "I agree."

"Oiy! Remus! Fass the pheacle art," Sirius managed to utter through a mouth full of pudding before spotting the look on the small brunette sitting across from him. He gulped down his mouthful with surprising speed. "What? I haven't eaten in a full hour!" he stated in his defense. Remus and the first year exchanged glances. Sirius then turned to Remus and said in a loud whisper "Isn't she a little young for you?" The young brunette blushed, stood up and stormed down the Great Hall to sit with her fellow first years. "I swear they get feistier," Sirius remarked. "Wouldn't you agree Prongsie?" He turned to James.

But "_Prongsie_" was busy gazing over at Chase and Lily with a hardened expression. Chase had his arm tightly wound around Lily's waist and they were sitting with Chase's "cronies" as Sirius called them.

"EARTH TO PRONGS!" Sirius bellowed.

"Yeah? OH, umm... definitely. I mean with their new seeker I'd say the Chudley cannons could quite possibly make it into the big lea-" "_James_. Were you listening to a word I said?" Remus enquired. "Honestly Moony? No." Sirius chuckled. "I was _saying_ that I think you should branch out this year. I know how you feel about Lily. But she's a completely different person now that she's with Chase. This is out last year! I don't want you to waste it by investing any more of your time moping over Lily Evans!"

James gave the pair one last glance before returning his gaze to his two friends. "I know, Moony. It's just- I can't help but think there's some part of Lily left!" Sirius gave his _here-we-go-again_ face, but James didn't notice. Remus looked at James with sad eyes. "You think she needs saving from her own choices. _But she doesn't, _Prongs, you need to get that. Lily makes her own decisions and you can't go around thinking she's some sort of toy that needs fixing."

_If only they knew the old Lily like I did,_ James thought.

"Maybe you're right," was all he said. They dropped the subject.

* * *

Lily yawned as she put down her glass of pumpkin juice. "You tired?" Chase asked. "A little," Lily admitted. Chased replied with out looking at her. "Well don't be. You haven't forgotten the back to school party I'm throwing in the Gryffindor common room?" "Of course not. But I- I think I'll skip out on it. I'm too... too-" she said as she failed to stifle a yawn. Chase's eyes flashed but he quickly turned it into a look of hurt. He turned Lily's head towards him and looked into her eyes for the first time throughout the feast. "Lily. I don't think you understand. I'm throwing a party. You're my girlfriend. Does that mean nothing to you?" His voice was accusatory. Lily crumbled under his eyes which had a pained look in them. "Chase. I didn't mean-" "Of Course you didn't," he said, cutting her off. There was a moment of silence, then "Come with me," pleaded Chase.

He grabbed Lily's wrist and walked out of the Great Hall. Lily couldn't tell if he was mad at her for not wanting to go to the party. "Chase?" she spoke softly.

He turned to her and she hated to see the look in his eyes. Hurt.

"Do you love me?" he blurted out. His eyes looked deep into her own.

"How could you say that?" Lily replied, Chase taking slow steps towards her. The closer he got, the faster her heart beat and the more she fumbled over her words. "I- I..." She thought back to the train and Emma's reaction to Lily's thoughts.

_It's just three words, Lily. Say it!_

"I lo-"

_Say it!_

Chase was inches away from her. "Iloveyou." The words finally slipped from her mouth unwillingly. But she couldn't think. She couldn't breathe.

"Just say you'll never want to leave me. _Please_ Lily," Chase whispered as his mouth brushed her ear.

"I... I could never leave you," she whispered breathlessly.

Satisfied, Chase pulled her into a fierce kiss that he must have thought was passionate. Lily froze under his lips. _We've kissed countless times, _she thought. _Why am I so uptight?_ But Chase didn't seem to notice. He grasped her waist and pulled in so close their bodies were pressed against each other. His mouth forced open hers and they backed up into the potions hall wall, Lily slamming into the bricks of the castle. "Chase," she mumbled against his lips. "Mm hm?" he croaked, his hands roaming up her back, lifting up the back of her uniform. "Chase, we shouldn't. Not now," Lily said. But Chase's hands continued to roam. "Stop," she insisted while trying to break free of his strong arms. She tried to push him off but he wouldn't let her go.

Just then, a messy-haired Marauder appeared from behind a corner. He looked breathless from running. "Wayward!" barked James, catching his breath.

Chase finally backed away from Lily and spun to look at who had interrupted him.

"What the hell do you want, Potter?"

"I_ want_ you to lay off Evans" retorted James.

"Piss off. We were just having a little fun, weren't we hun?" His expression softened as he turned to Lily. But Lily remained silent, a little in shock.

"From my perspective it looked a little one sided," James remarked with an air of fake politeness.

"Potter," Lily breathed, finding her voice. "It's fine. I have it under control." But James just looked at her. He seemed to read her expression a little too well. But all he said was "If you say so," and walked past the pair of them, glaring at Chase as he did so.

* * *

Lily wished Emma and Brooke would come with her to Chase's parties. They used to go just so Lily wouldn't feel so alone surrounded by Chase's friends all night, but it was a school night and if this was fifth year, Lily wouldn't be caught dead out late on a school night unless it was for homework purposes. She couldn't blame them.

"Uh, Chase?" Lily had to yell over the sound of laughter. Chase turned from his "cronies" to look at Lily. "I'm going to the bathroom, I'll be back soon." Chase eyed Lily and said "I'll go with you." "Don't be silly, I'll be back in a wave of a wand." Chase looked like he was going to protest but Michael Portoso had got his attention by bringing fire whiskey he stole from the Three Broomsticks over to where Chase sat. Lily escaped his grasp and made her way out of the crowds of people.

Just then, Peter Pettigrew, a small mousy boy appeared at her side. "Oh. Hey Peter." Lily smiled. "I didn't see you at the feast." Peter didn't smile back. "I have a message," he announced. Lily glanced back at Chase who was already looking her way. "Not to sound rude, but could you make it quick?" Chase was very protective of Lily being around anyone but him. "Chase is a good guy for you. He's good for you in ways you don't understand."

Lily waited, but Peter didn't say anything else. He looked uncomfortable under her gaze. A bead of sweat rolled down his chubby face. "That's it?" Lily replied. "Well who's the message from?" Peter looked more nervous as he tugged at his plaid collar. "I can't-" he stopped, looking at something, or rather some_one_ behind Lily.

Chase emerged from the swarm of people. "What's going on?" he enquired with an air of toughness. "Nothing. Peter just wanted to ask me some-" she cut off, gesturing to Peter. But he had left. Chase raised his eyebrows. "Erm, nothing," she said. "Good." Chase seemed satisfied, pulling her back into the throng of people.

Lily kept quiet through the rest of the night. Her mind kept reeling about the message. _What did it mean? Who sent it?_

But all that answered her were the empty questions echoing in her head.

* * *

_**A/N: **Wow, that was faster than I expected. I think that was some sort of update record! Anyway, there's a lot of hints in this chapter that set up the plot-points and this chapter was mostly to kind of get a sense of the characters, especially Chase. Hope you liked it, I'm aiming to be done chapter three by Thursday. And review please! Reviews make me happier than chocolate and kittens in a basket delivered to me by my favourite celebrity._

_Okay, maybe not to that extent. But you get the idea :)_

_xoxo_

_- Marauder-Evans_


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